Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
