butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
