You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
NoShamevember. You game?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
