just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize
