drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize