I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
