Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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