Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
