I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
We got so high we made milksteak
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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