I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize