My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize
