It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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