Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
it glows. i had to have it.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
