eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
