By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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