rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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