guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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