My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
