wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Randomize
