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• (301): View more from Maryland

  i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Does that work!! Please say yes

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• (914): View more from New York

  I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.

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• (574): View more from Indiana

  I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis

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• (916): View more from California

  Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT

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