It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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