I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I currently don't understand fingers.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
