Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
