3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
try to milk me bitch
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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