i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I understand Curling. That high.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
