How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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