I showed him my bush... on skype.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Randomize
