So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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