let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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