Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
