Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
