I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
