I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize