Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize