Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
You can't just leave with hair like that
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
