the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
