This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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