Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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