what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
