hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I can't turn off my feet"
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
