so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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