You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
