He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
