how can u be prego again
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
