I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
