you guys were way drunker than both of me
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
