Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
