Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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