You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
