I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Randomize
