belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize